Skip to main content

2 Months

Today marks two months since we went to the doctor and found that there was no heartbeat. I was having a crappy weekend anyway and then it hit me what today's date is. Yesterday was really rough for reasons I won't mention and then came today.
I woke up and tried to quietly get things done around the house while I let Tommy sleep a little longer. After he woke up we sat down to a bowl of cereal and flipped on the tv and after channel surfing came across the morning news. Following a commercial break a segment came on about the history of day light saving time and we panicked- we didn't have an hour and a half to get ready for church- we had half an hour. And so the day began. We actually made it on time with my hair sopping wet (but then that's normal since I only use a blow dryer once or twice a year) and realized that there were quite a few people that didn't get the memo on the time change.
Everything was ok during the service until the children's message and I couldn't take my eyes off this goofy blond kid running up the isle to make it to the very front. He reminded me of all the stories I've heard of Tommy's childhood as he sat and squirmed waiting for the other children to get there so things could begin. As if that wasn't hard enough to watch the children's minister looked right at the little boy and asked Levi how he was doing. At that point I couldn't hold the tears back any more and fumbled through my purse for the stash of napkins I keep for just such an occasion. The rest of the children's service I just kept thinking that if our Levi turned out to be anything like his dad he would've been just like the Levi up there as he continued to pipe up and share his thoughts throughout the message.
The tears countined during the preacher's message as he talked about love and seemed to keep commenting about the special love between a mother and child that begins in the womb. At the end of the service one lady came up to me with tears in her eyes and said she just needed to hug me. I was very touched but then my own tears just started up again.
After letting it all out I pulled myself together and helped Tommy with some chores and we chatted with a friend that came to see us but then I found out that a friend of ours had their baby today and I lost it again. So here I am, two months have gone by and we've had some good days- but this was not one of them.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Thankfulness

It's been 6 years since hearing the silence we expected to be a heartbeat. As I think back today, I am filled with thankfulness. I'm thankful for... ... a God who has brought comfort when I mourned. ... His peace that surpasses all understanding. ... the joy that comes in the mourning. ... a faith that weathered the storms. ... a husband that provided and held it together when I couldn't. ... a husband who finds joy in being a daddy to our two blessings. ... our family and friends that mourned with us. ... our family and friends who now rejoice with us. ... the restoration of relationships. ... the two blessings that now call me mama. ... the ability to realize the important things in life aren't things. ... the joy a simple snuggle brings knowing that we aren't guaranteed anything in this life. ... being able to share Levi's story with others. ... healing. I am so grateful that God prepared us in so many ways before Levi's death and he's brought ...

Grieving with children

I signed up a while ago to be apart of a study on grief and just completed a survey. It's detailed (meaning it took longer than five minutes to complete- luckily Madalyn is napping now) but I felt it was worthwhile... if you have some time they want to hear the views of parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, siblings and friends who have experienced the death of a child. http://tearstudy.org I'm not sure if I misrepresented my grieving or not... it asked questions about the last seven days. If you'd asked me three weeks ago or two months ago my answers would've been different. I don't know if it was the focus of October 15th or not but I was definitely an emotional wreck for about a week. I haven't been hit with too many waves of grief in a while so in an odd sort of way its felt good to just let the tears come. Its given me a different perspective on things. Its hard to grieve and parent at the same time. I had never realized how in some ways it was a blessing ...

Two worlds

I feel like I’ve got my feet in two worlds and I don’t always know how to handle it or balance it. I don’t always feel like I fit in with the mom group… I’m not a stay at home mom and yet I’m not working full time either. I don’t have the innocence that many of them have and can’t always relate to everything. Yet I feel like I don’t always feel like I fit in the loss community either. It’s not that I’ve forgotten or moved on now that I have a child but joy has come in the morning. I’ve recently met two women who lost their sons almost exactly three years after Levi died… it’s just so strange because at the same time I’m involved with forming a small group of moms through our church. Two worlds and I’m in both… but not really. Where do I fit? What is my role? I feel like I’m not the right person in either case. I don’t know how apparent it is to other people- especially those that know me from the coffee shop- but I’m timid with new people. Inviting people to join in has been a big step...

Levi Aaron

Levi Aaron